Communication between people from different cultures involves far more than simply understanding each other's words. For communication to be successful, we need to be aware of others' rules of conversation, like how far apart we should stand, which topics are acceptable to talk about, or whether it's OK to interrupt a person or to be silent. Getting these things wrong can lead to misunderstandings or even cause offence.
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| photo credit: christels |
Personal Space
So let's look first at the question of personal space. How far apart do you stand during conversation? Well, this varies widely between cultures. In North America, the average distance between two people, who are not close friends, who are engaged in casual conversation, is 45 centimetres.
But in Western Europe, this distance is a little less - 36-40 centimetres. In Japan, a respectful distance is considered to be around 90 centimetres, whereas in the Middle East a distance of 20-30 centimetres is the norm. You need to get these distances right. Stand too close and you might make someone feel awkward; too far away and you will give the impression of being distant and unfriendly.
Silence
Another important aspect of cross-cultural communication is the number of silences in a conversation. Most Europeans and North Americans avoid long silences. For them, silence suggests something negative - it can mean that you feel uncomfortable, or shy, or angry or that you are not interested in the topic. But in some East Asian countries, for example, silences are perfectly acceptable. In fact, silence is seen as a positive thing. It shows respect. It shows you are listening.
Volume up/down
Voice volume also differs greatly between cultures. People from South America, for example, or southern Europe, tend to speak more loudly than people from northern Europe. It is easy, for example, to think a group of people from Brazil are having an argument when in fact they are just having an enthusiastic discussion. In some parts of East Asia, on the other hand, people speak more softly than either Europeans or Americans.
Topics
Another key to successful communication between cultures is knowing which topics are appropriate to discuss. Different cultures have different rules, and it's easy to put your foot in it by asking the wrong questions, particularly when making small talk with people you don't know well.
In many countries, like China, for instance, it's very normal to ask somebody how old they are, or how much they earn. But a person from the UK, for example, wouldn't feel at ease with these questions. Questions about somebody's political views are also not appropriate. Safer topics of conversation would include questions about where they are from or about sport. And of course the weather is also a favourite.
Gestures
And finally, I'd like to talk about gestures - the signs we make with our hands. Although many gestures have the same meaning the world over, there are a few common ones which can offend people in some countries. The 'come here' sign made by curling your finger towards you is extremely rude in many countries, including Slovakia and many parts of South East Asia. In the Philippines, you can actually be arrested for making this gesture! And then there's the 'thumbs up' sign, which in many parts of the world means 'Well done!' or 'l like it'. However, in some countries, like Greece and countries in the Middle East, it can cause great offence.
